WITH SO MANY CHOICES, MEN CAN CHOOSE WRONG

He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from God- Proverbs -18:22

A good woman is easy to find. Most women are inherently good prospects for lasting relationships. Perhaps, it's because of the natural bonds that women share and their sense of family. They readily share information and gather together for girls' nights and conferences and even, the kitchen table at barbecues. They share generations of information about life, love, family and the latest news and recipes. This bond has helps them sustain good traditions and values over the generations.

We men like to categorize all this as just plain gossip. We do ourselves a disservice when we make such blanket statements. These circles that women forge are vital to our society and their personal growth as a whole. It explains the dynamic strides they have made in a world long dominated by the male perspective. Perhaps out of necessity, these alliances between Mother and daughter, sister and friends have survived religious and misogynist persecution. Truth is, male philosophy and rule has done nothing but solidified the bond between women.

Women naturally choose the side of one another

Though "catty" at times among themselves over beauty, outfits and hairstyles, when the lines are drawn between the male and female perspective, woman naturally choose the side of one another. While men are moved by power to commit such despicable acts as murder and racism and heresy, women are peace oriented creatures bound by love and companionship. Throughout history we've see the results of such manic power like slavery, feudalism and segregation be brought down by the defiant love of a woman. Coretta Scott King and Benazir Bhutto are a couple of examples.

I live in Los Angeles and there are plethora of wonderful good-looking women. I prefer Black women, personally, and there are even more good choices in this group. They come in all fascinating shapes, hues and cultures. Some days, just walking down the street is a neck workout in itself. I found my head to be on a perpetual swivel amazed at all their beauty and mannerisms. It had gotten to the point where I, like most men, began to panic as to how I would choose the right one.

They come in all shapes, hues and cultures

I wondered how, with all these great choices, we were all falling "in love with a stripper" or the "botox bandits". Not to degrade a woman for being an exotic dancer, but it speaks to the irony of the matter and the obvious lack of a man's self-worth and moral judgement. I would love to tell you that I chose poorly, but this is not the case. If a man chooses poorly it is not a reflection on the types of available women, but on the type of man he truly is. My bad decisions were based on me just being a bad self evaluator. I had plenty of good choices, but bad decision making skills.

We don't gather like women and pass down pertinent information on manhood. We gather for war deployments and tailgate parties. Most of our time is spent arguing Kobe v. Lebron or lying about who has more women than the other. So, in honor of the gentlemen who have turned the corner of Maturity Street and Future Avenue, seeking good taste and lasting companionship, I decided to list the five best ways to bag a Mechelle Obama and avoid the all too addictive Kim Khardasians.


Rule #1 Make Sure She Has Great Intelligence...
A sea of beautiful women is a wet nightmare! I liken it to having a universal key at a Ferrari dealership. All the Ferraris look hot, so you want to test drive them. The only problem is, only a few of the cars have "great engines". You'll lose interest hooping out of 50 cars before you find the one that lives up to its' billing. Ask the right questions, listen to the answers carefully and avoid the bad test drives. A nice "ride" can help you go much further, much quicker in life... GPS standard.

Rule #2 She Can Make a Dollar out of Fifteen Cents
My dad always told me that a woman's test in life is material and a man's test is a woman. Discover if she is resourceful and thrifty. She shouldn't be a poster child for Goodwill, but they shouldn't know her by name in Bergdoff Goodman either. Nothing like breaking your back for a woman who just has to have the latest and greatest of material things to feel good about herself. Low self-esteem is expensive! This is also a sign of Daddy issues. You should only "play" Daddy in those intimate moments or "be" Daddy to your kids.

Rule #3 Give Rappers The Middle Finger
The only advice worst than a woman's single girlfriend, is the that of your typical MC. They don't have all the girls, they don't take every other rapper's girlfriend or have the biggest Johnson. They aren't married to the super-hot stripper in their videos. Most of the rappers in a relationship are in one with a modestly attractive high school sweet heart, a career woman or the "around the way" girl that made homeboy chase them. Snoop Lion, LL and Ice Cube are some examples, to name a few.

Rule #4 Your Mother Isn't That Hot and You Ain't Either
One of my biggest pet peeves is when my unattractive friends with beer bellies and pathetic social skills, go all Simon Cowell on a girl. Remember, if women were as aesthetically judgmental about us as we are about them, then most of us would be single. Thank God they aren't! So show the man upstairs some gratitude and pick someone with personality, depth and a godly spirit like your mother. She should make sure you are fed, pester you about your health and drag you to church. You'll make a happy family and she'll make you happy. Love is the best beer goggles! It makes everything more beautiful! Plus, it's free and the hangover is awesome. Beauty fades!! Don't believe me? Think about how many of your friends' moms are MILFs....I'll wait.

Rule #5 Don't Look Around, Check Yourself
This is really the first rule. Look at what you have to offer before you go out interviewing prospects. I understand the urge to take a resume or two. Been there, bro! But you gotta take the reins and pull back a bit if you don't possess a good benefits package. Don't give me that crap about "gold diggers". Not buying it!! If your prospects are gold-diggers than you are probably a "Shallow Hal" type dude. If you wanna sign a blue chip women you better have a max contract to offer. That offer doesn't just mean financial. Financial gain is just the result of being hard-working, spiritually ambitious, focused, grounded and insanely committed. If you aren't these things then you better look for a mentor, a college, a church and a better job. If you think it's cool to mooch off a female then you, my friend, have the dreaded Mommy issues! Address that first. It's not what's hot on the streets, right now!