"Being a woman is a terribly difficult task, since it consist principally in dealing with men"- Joseph Conrad
I called LaRae Wilson, founder of
BiPolar Gear and a lifelong friend, on the phone this morning and I was met with a pleasant surprise. LaRae is always a pleasure to talk to and to be around, but this friend of over twenty years had something very different to say than normal. She told me about her new walk in Christ and how she, like myself, was being tested in her temperament and understanding of the scriptures. She spoke about her new zeal for God's Word and a revelation that she had about herself from the Holy Spirit:
"God told me that I was a mutant", explained Wilson,
"I was functioning out of my design as a women and taking on too many things that a man was designed to do".
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| LaRae Wilson, left, with model, Chanel Davis |
I was intrigued by this revelation and, so immediately, I got to my computer and looked up the word "Mutation" on Wikipedia. It is defined as following:
"In genetics, mutation is a change of the nucleotide sequence of the genome of an organism, virus or extra chromosomal genetic element. Mutations result from unrepaired damage to DNA or the RNA genomes...from errors in the process of replication or from the insertion or deletion of segments of DNA by mobile genetic elements. Mutations may not produce discernible changes in the observable characteristics (phenotype) of an organism. Mutation plays a role in both normal and abnormal biological processes, including evolution, cancer and the development of the immune system."
LaRae, like many women have, whether by force or free will, gone through a mutation in free society over the last 70 years. Though working was never new to women, during World War II, the idea of masses of women in the workplace was put to test. Though out of necessity, yet unlike within poor families, this particular change in American was facilitated by a
"propaganda campaign to sell the importance of the war effort and lure women to enter into the manufacturing sector" (
Rosie the Riveter).
Some positive of this propaganda is the independence that women gained in realizing their buying power. This power, coupled with expanding voting rights and political awareness, gave women a near equal footing on the social playing field. The "near equal" being made evident today in the fact that women earn $8,000 less annually than their male counterparts according to
CNN. Something the Obama administration looked to correct with the passage of the Lilly Ledbetter Bill of 2009.
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| Single mothers are more susceptible to poverty |
Though women are being promoted as CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, representing districts as Congresswomen and nations as presidents and heads of state, they have suffered from a more less positive mutation. According to
singlemotherguide.com,
"As of 2011, 11.7 million families in the US were headed by single parents, 85.2% of which were headed by a female". Consequently, this has lead to a spike in poverty and the resulting rise in juvenile delinquency. The Labor Department reports that
half of the
unemployed women were those with children under the age of 18 (1.2 million).
Half of single mother families have an annual income of less than $25,000. According to the Hamilton Project at Brookings Institution, the
annual earnings of single parent families plummeted 20% between 2007 and 2010, compared to
only 5% for two parent families.
These numbers can be attributed to the inability to receive affordable day care for working mothers, income inequality and a lack of corporate flexibility to the needs of single parents. But, the most glaring negative of working women and single mothers is the
"mother-man mutation" of women into more masculine roles in the family and society.
Women are forced to do things that men were designed to do and as a result have had to make changes to their God-given purpose in an effort to sustain a viable family and social relavence. And though it has been deemed necessary at times, it is not one that most women desire to do.
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| Childhood problems linked to absentee fathers |
Whether through war, incarceration or indifference,
men have greatly lacked in fulfilling their God-given roles in the life of society today. While radical Muslim extremist continue to suppress the freedom and talents of women, many Christian nations like America are exploiters of women in the home and workplace and are unwilling to protect them from danger and social injustice. In recent days, the Republican-lead House begrudgingly sent the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) to the desk of President Obama's desk for signage. Several Republican lawmakers dismissed the need to protect American women from domestic abuse, stalking, assault and workplace harassment. Ran Paul (R-KY) was one of eight zealots who voted to strike down the 18 year old measure. Women make up over 50% of the total electorate, but only 18% of the 535 seats in this the 113th Congress This is further evidence that women are being misrepresented in the political arena.
I attend a church of about 2,000 members and roughly half of them are men. However, the majority of the leadership and administrative positions are headed by women. When asking those men to serve, from my experience, most do not desire to be in a position of labor and responsibility. This is not new in church or society. The Apostle Paul, in the Book of Philemon, had to urge Timothy to;
"help those women which laboured with me in the gospel". His is
an unheard cry that resonates throughout the Church and the home even today.
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| Music like Rap objectify women |
Media and entertainment also continue to objectify women in the most demeaning light. Most of the music on the radio in America that is classified as "love songs" merely sexualizes women and highlight their physical attributes. The nature and beauty of womanhood as the factual persona of purity and wisdom is trampled upon by innuendos of lust and characteristics of incompetence and irrationality.
Women who are unyielding to immoral demands or are proponents for equal rights are labeled as "bitches" and cast aside as nothing.
The mutation of
"mother-man" has damaged not only the lives of the economic capacity of women and the potential success of their children, with 40% of single mothers below the poverty rate, but has damaged free nations overall. The added burden of women, poor or middle-class, being left to survive unguarded in society, has created a cancerous mutation in the female psyche. Many women are burdened with having to be a respectable women, breadwinner and a male-like figure to their children. This burden has added undeserved stress and provoked a trepidation and distrust of men in general.
"Its challenging at times. We have to find the work life balance and be there for our children", Rebecca Collins, former vice president of Signworks in Indianapolis.
Some critics blame the method of distribution of entitlements as one of the causes for the break up of the family structure. They feel that the welfare system encourages "backdoor relationships" where the unemployed father or male guardian is forced to live outside the home so that the mother can receive full benefits or assistance. Some critics point to the high cost of living that has forced some women to do the difficult work at home, as well as on a job. Theological critics cite a
breakdown in the moral compass of the male psyche and his turning away from his God-given dominion of a responsible reflection of Christ toward the women and children in his care and in his culture. Women point to the deterioration of fundamental "old school" values in men such as
hard work, chivalry and moral ambition.
Dr. Cindy Trimm, best selling author and former senator, warns women against what she believes is a "culture" that leads women to think they can and must do life alone. She affirms that there is nothing wrong with desiring help from a man.
"We all know that God created Adam first and Eve second. I don't mind being second because we all know that the second edition of anything is better than the first", preached Trimm to thousands of followers in Dallas.
"I'm single. I admit to you that I need a man! Ain't nothing like the real thing, baby! Ain't nothing like the real thing"!
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| Men of Project Fatherhood take time with their children in L.A. |
Thankfully,
some men are getting the understanding and assertiveness to break the cycle of male apathy and insensitivity. Men are joining more male centered groups and workshops in an effort to take back there rightful place as
priest, provider and protector of the women and children of their communities. For example, underprivileged fathers meet weekly in South Los Angeles to encourage one another to break the generational curse of fatherless households in their community of Jordan Downs. The group named
Project Fatherhood meets every week to steer men away from crime and into the trust and respect of their children and wives. Headed my Craig McGruder, an ex-convict and father, the men in program share advice, network employment opportunities and spread the word throughout their housing project to other men who seek to make right the wrong choices and to make amends with their family and love ones by living up to their full potential.
"Growing up the way we did, during the time we did, a lot of the dads might as well have been in another world, said Anthony Christian, a Project Fatherhood leader,
"There had to be a better way at looking at being a dad. That's what we want people to think about".
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| Paul Washer |
Paul Washer, founder of
Heartcry Missionary Society, takes a bolder biblical approach when he extols the virtues of manhood in society towards women. He teaches young males on the responsibilities of manhood in society and to it's women in his "Manhood Series" on courtship and dating. He admonishes men to view women as
"God's daughters" and to treat them with honor and holiness. He believes that women
aren't trophies to "date", but gifts from God that men should not approach intimately except in an effort to marry and protect.
"There is no such thing as biblical dating. If you're dating, I don't care who you are, you are out of God's will. Period", Washer explains,
"You can talk to me about it later, you can be mad if you want. But, that's just the truth. There is no such thing as recreational dating. There is biblical courtship, there is no recreational dating".
Much is to be done for women in our society to becoming all that God intended for them to . I, for one, will definitely do my part to eradicate the hideous "mother-man" psyche that has engulfed the lives of our most precious resource, our women.
They are the most valuable asset to any productive society. It is well known that the welfare of women is the infallible reflection of any culture. Women possess a keen awareness, a strategic intelligence, a strong sense of family and a gentle compassion that befuddles men, yet preserves his legacy throughout generations of humanity.
Women are designed to be loved, encouraged, protected and free to do all the things that give us all reason to live and dream. I pray that through Christ and the Holy Spirit, my friend LaRae and countless other women are not hindered by the lack of leadership by men in our society, but that they be remain rooted int the woman-mother expression of God, so that
we can all live out our days in wholeness, holiness and the love of on another.
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